EGGS

by
Thom Jacques

"See you around seven," said Bill.

Dav took his time walking the driveway. He waved goodbye to Bill and started for the house. He liked those few steps in the afternoon between the van and the front door. He breathed in and swirled his palm over his belly a few times before grabbing the door handle. He could hear the TV going as soon as he stepped inside. He kicked off his boots on the mat.

"Is that you, Dav?" she said.

Dav puffed his cheeks out but didn't say anything.

"Stick the kettle on, Dav," she said. "And make sure your boots are on the mat."

Dav filled the kettle and stuck it on. He could hear the music from one of Cindy's favourite TV soaps in the lounge. He hated that music but knew he'd get a good half an hour to soak in the bath before she came looking.

He lay there with his eyes closed letting the water bite the cuts on his hands. When the TV music started up again he sank his ears under the water and fixed his eyes on the ceiling. He thought it could do with a lick of paint. Then he closed his eyes again and drifted off to sleep.

When he woke the water was cold and the room was dark. He pulled the plug and reached for the towel on the radiator. He could hear the TV barking through the floorboards as he walked towards the bedroom. He slipped some socks on and then a clean shirt. It was Wednesday. On Wednesdays they went to bingo together with Sid and Julia. Bill also went along. Bill used to go with Sylvia but now it was just Bill. Cindy often complained that it was awkward with Bill on his own. She wanted Dav to tell him but Dav knew it was all that Bill had. He'd listen to Bill in work talk about how the phone had rung off just as he got through the door and was sure that it was her. He'd ask Dav if he thought she was going to come back. 'Sure Bill,' he'd say. And Bill would nod and pick up the next brick a bit quicker. He'd talk about how he missed her cooking and how he was getting sick of eggs. He said there were only so many ways to cook an egg before getting sick of it . He'd tried ketchup, salt, mayonnaise and brown sauce. He'd asked Dav if he thought Lea and Perrins would work. Dav said he thought it would. Bill said good, it was all he had left.

Over food Cindy talked about her day. Dav nodded whilst he ate.

"I put the whites through today," she said. "They got a good blast on the line this afternoon."

Dav felt sick listening to the food slop around in her mouth whilst she ate and talked. She brought Dav up to date with the TV soaps. She talked about them as if they were real. Then she started talking about some religious programme she'd been watching on the 'God channel' and how there was this woman from Kentucky in America talking about how God was coming again and how everybody's lives would be on a big screen for all to see.

"I want us to stop swearing, Dav. Can we stop swearing?"

Dav started downing his glass of water to try and stop himself from laughing.

"Well, Dav?" she said.

"O.k, Cindy, o.k."

Bill was hitting the whisky pretty hard that night. He didn't really care about the bingo. Dav was out too. Cindy had shaken her head at Dav and moved down to the other end of the table with Sid and Julia. They liked to play Bingo. Whenever either of them got a number they would slide their tongues in and out of each other's mouths for a second or two. Bill used to be like that with Sylvia, but now he'd just look away and bring his whisky glass to his lips.

Bill came back from the bar with a couple of tequilas for him and Dav. Dav drank his before Cindy looked over, and sat there sucking on his piece of lemon. Bill didn't bother with salt and lemon.

"You know what, Dav? - fuck her is what I say. Huh? - Fuck her."

Dav just sat there looking at his whisky glass. Sid had just got another number and leant towards Julia.

"She didn't have to take the cat though. I miss the cat."

"She was a cute cat," said Dav.

"Yes, she was," said Bill.

Dav dropped his lemon in the ashtray and started reaching with his tongue for a piece of lemon between his teeth.

"The note said she'd been thinking about it for a while," said Bill. "I gave her everything I had, Dav. She liked things. You saw how pretty she looked in things."

Dav nodded. He was looking at Cindy. She scratched the back of her ear then looked at her finger.

"She gets me in the gut, Dav. You know what I mean?" said Bill.

Bill leant forward and rubbed his face with his hands.

Dav was looking at Cindy's stomach fold over the top of her jeans. He was wondering when it got to be that way, then Julia shouted 'Bingo'.

The next morning Bill didn't come by the house to pick Dav up. Dav was sitting in his work clothes drinking coffee and cutting the crusts off his sandwiches when the phone rang.

"Dav?"

"Yeah."

"Bill. I'm not going to make it today. We'll take the day off, o.k?"

"You doing o.k, Bill? - Bill?" The phone line went dead. When Dav hung up he saw a note next to the phone from Cindy.

Dav, gone to see Mum, clean up those empty bottles before you leave for work. Love, Cindy.

Dav kept looking at the word “Love”. He just kept looking at it. Then the phone rang. He answered it.

"Hello." There was sobbing down the phone. "Bill, is that you? - Bill?"

"The cat, Dav, the cat."

"Hang on Bill, I'll be right over."

The back door was wide open when Dav got there. He walked into the kitchen. There were boxes and bottles and cans and tins lying around.

"Jesus," said Dav. "Bill? - Bill?"

Dav looked around downstairs but couldn't find him. He made his way upstairs and along the landing.

"Bill?"

When Dav pushed the door open Bill was sitting on the floor with one leg straight and the other one bent off to the side, like he was jumping a hurdle. He was wearing one of Sylvia's dresses. The tight, white one. Bill always liked the tight, white one. He had a pair of her tights on with his leg hair poking through rips in the thighs. His head was back on the bed. He had red lipstick smeared around his mouth and mascara lines like paint drips down his face. There were white dots in Bill's chest hair. When Dav moved closer he saw they were pills. Maybe a dozen of them.

"Jesus," said Dav.

Then he saw a few stuck to Bill's left palm. Then he saw the bottle on the floor just below his fingers. There weren't any pills in there.

The doctor said he was going to be fine. They all just sat there looking at Bill rigged up to the machines. Julia had her head on Sid's shoulder. Cindy sat next to them with her hand on Julia's knee. Dav sat across the other side of the bed looking out the window. The beep of the machine was steady. They all listened to the beep of the machine. Then, after about twenty minutes Sid said, "Why has Bill got makeup all over his face?"

He looked at Dav. Cindy and Julia looked at Bill, then at Dav. Dav kept looking out the window.

Julia put her head back on Sid's shoulder and said, "The numbers didn't mean anything to him last night."

Dav just kept on looking through the glass. Sid looked over and saw the dress on the chair. He pointed his chin towards it.

"Isn't that one of Sylvia's dresses?" he said. "What the hell is it doing here?"

"Oh, Jesus," said Julia.

"Don't say that," said Cindy.

Sid and Julia looked at Cindy. They both looked at her as if she was insane, then they looked at Dav. Dav kept looking out the window.

"Sylvia always looked good in that dress," said Sid. Julia nodded. "Bill always liked Sylvia in that dress."

Sid and Julia said they were going to get something to drink from the cafeteria. They asked if Cindy or Dav wanted anything but they said they didn't. Cindy was looking at the machines. Then she put her hands together, closed her eyes and started whispering.

"What are you doing?" asked Dav.

"I'm praying, Dav," she said.

Dav put his head back and looked at the ceiling. His shoulders began to move and after a few seconds he began to laugh hysterically.

"You're a friggin' lunatic," he said.

Cindy just kept on praying, but she started shouting and punching her fist in the air. Dav wiped his thumb and forefinger across his eyelids a few times but didn't say anything. She continued. Dav listened to her. It sounded like she was speaking in a deep south accent. A Welsh woman from Newport speaking in an American accent.

"Dear Lord, help this man," she said.

Dav started to laugh again.

"For Christ's sake Cindy, 'this man, this man'. It's Bill for Christ's sake."

"Stop saying that," she screamed.

Just then a nurse walked into the room.

She said, "Sshh." They both looked at her. "We hear out there you know."

She pointed through the glass into the corridor. Everything went quiet for a few seconds and then they went back to listening to the pulse of the machine. Then Sid and Julia came back into the room giggling. When they saw the nurse, they stopped.

"Is everything o.k?" asked Sid.

"You really should be leaving now," said the nurse, looking at her watch.

"But what about him?" said Cindy raising her eyes at Bill.

"Are you family? asked the nurse.

"No," said Julia, "but he's got no-one."

They all thought about that for a few seconds.

"I'm sorry," said the nurse, "but you've only got another couple of minutes."

Then she left. Sid had a magazine rolled in his hand.

"A little something for when he wakes," he said to Dav.

Dav unrolled it and looked at the cover. 'Anglers Weekly' it said.

"Open it," he said.

When Dav opened it there was a copy of 'Lesbian Lust' gaffer-taped to the centre pages.

"We'll phone you later," said Sid.

Then Sid and Julia left. Cindy closed her eyes and started praying again. Dav sat there looking at her.

"Dear Lord," she said. "Why is this man so lonely?" There was silence. "He just needs love, Lord," she said.

Dav kept looking at her.

"How did things get this bad?" she said.

Then there was more silence. Neither of them said anything for a while. The machine kept beeping along. Cindy kept her eyes closed, waiting for an answer. Dav kept looking, then he looked at the dress on the chair and thought about how crumpled it looked. He picked it up and threw it over his shoulder.

"I'm going," he said to Cindy.

She didn't open her eyes.

"Cindy, I'm going to get some things for Bill," he said, holding up the keys to Bill's house.

She just stayed in the same position. He looked at her for a few more seconds, then he left.

Dav drove the work van from the hospital. He drove through Newport towards Bill's place. The van was quiet without Bill. There was a lot of litter in the van. Dav thought that he was going to clean it out for when Bill got home.

Dav looked through the kitchen cupboards at Bill's. There was nothing much to drink. Dav loaded the kettle with water and stuck it on. He found a mug with a few pens in. He took the pens out, wiped the cup in his t-shirt and stuck a tea bag in it. He found a black bag and started filling it with rubbish. When he finished he washed a few plates and forks in the sink. Then he washed a small saucepan and a frying pan. Both had bits of egg stuck to them. Dav really had to scrub to get that egg off. When he was scrubbing he kept thinking of Bill cooking those eggs on the stove. When he finished he walked into the hallway and found Bill's phone book. He couldn't find any numbers in there for Sylvia, just one for her mother. He dialled it. It rang a few times before a woman answered.

"Hello."

"Hello?" said Dav.

"Who is this?" she said.

"I'm a friend of Bill's."

"Who?"

"Bill Willpole," said Dav.

"Oh, him," said the woman.

"Yes, him," said Dav. "I need to speak to Sylvia. It's about Bill. I need her number."

"I'm afraid I can't give you her number."

"But, this is..."

She cut Dav off.

"You know he used to phone here all the time asking for her? I'm pushing seventy, it's not easy getting up and down all the time when you're pushing seventy."

"No, I'm sure," said Dav.

"Besides, Sylvia told me never to give out her number to him."

"Bill tried to kill himself yesterday. Last night, this morning, Bill tried to kill himself. Jesus," he said. "Oh, God."

Dav started to cry. He was trying to hold back but his throat started to burn and then his shoulders began to move. She could hear Dav crying down the phone. Neither of them said anything for a while. She just listened to him sob and he listened to her breathe. Then Dav stopped.

She said, "Have you got a pen?"

Dav didn't want to phone Sylvia. He didn't want to go upstairs just yet either. He pushed some air out though his lips and picked up the phone. He listened to the dial tone for a while whilst he tried to figure out what it was he was going to say. Then he dialled the number Sylvia's mother had given him. He listened to it ring a few times before a kid answered it.

"Hello," said the kid.

"Hello?" said Dav.

Then the line crackled and went dead. When Dav phoned back the answer phone kicked in - Hi, this is Sylvia. I'm afraid Leo and I are out at the moment, or we're upstairs (giggle giggle). Anyway we can't take your call right now, so leave your name and number and we'll get back to you just as soon as we can.

Dav hung up.

He sat down on the sofa in the lounge for a while looking at the number on the torn piece of paper between his thumbs. He took a sip of tea and closed his eyes for a second. Then he opened them and looked around the room. There was a portable TV on a cardboard box in the corner. There was an unplugged fan in the middle of the room. He looked at the walls and thought about how they could do with a coat of paint. The blinds were half closed so the light came through as fingers. Dav looked at the dust move in the light. He thought about how beautiful it looked. He'd never noticed how beautiful dust was in sunlight before. He couldn't hear anything. Then something thumped hard against the window. Dav jumped up and rushed over. He opened the blinds with his second and third finger. There was thick, yellow goo running down the window. As he looked at it another one exploded on the glass. He jumped back. It was egg. He ran towards the front door and opened it. There were school kids running down the street hurling eggs at each other and houses. A car went past and swerved as an egg moved through the air.

"Hey," shouted Dav.

As he did a few of them turned to look at Dav before throwing a few eggs at him. Dav ducked inside the house and listened to them hit the door. Then he ran outside and down the driveway.

"Hey," he shouted shaking his fist.

The kids started to run. There was a smaller kid at the bottom of the drive covered in egg. Dav grabbed him by his eggy collar.

"What's with the eggs?" he shouted at the kid.

"Don't blame me," said the kid. "I didn't throw any."

"Why are they throwing eggs? said Dav, raising his eyebrows and looking towards the other boys.

"It's the twentieth of July," said the kid.

"So?" said Dav.

"So we just finished school for the summer," said the kid. "They got me badly," he said to Dav, looking himself over.

"You got eggs?" asked Dav.

The kid didn't have eggs. Dav ran into the house and opened Bill's fridge. There were four eggs in a box. Dav grabbed them and ran back outside. He gave two to the kid and kept two for himself. They had one in each hand. Dav started running after the kids down the street.

"Come on," he said to the kid.

The kid started running behind Dav. The sunlight was bursting between the houses at them. The other boys saw them coming and threw a few eggs at them, then carried on running. They were fast. Dav started to open out his strides until he couldn't hear the smaller kid behind him any more. He started to sweat. He stopped thinking about Cindy and Bill and Sylvia and all the rest. His chest started to burn. He turned the corner at the end of the street and kept running towards the sun. He noticed that his heart was beating fast for the first time in a long time.

© Thom Jacques
Reproduced with permission